Life Out of Process

Explosive PPO (Pre-Placement Offer): n. Stuff which makes you write articles like these for magazines like these.

Accepting an Explosive PPO: v. Stuff which makes you write this extra definition.

It came sometime in the 5th term. Don’t remember the date exactly. The only thing I know is that I have watched 59 movies after that (including 8 movies in a 48 hr span and 3 Korean movies). A yearly growth of 1400% for me. Created an id at IMDB (earth’s biggest movie database). Read the trivia, goofs, memorable quotes, business data (I’m an MBA, remember?), then voted for the movie. They keep a vote history for each user. That’s where I knew the count.

Then there was an article about Taiwan asserting independence. Mainland attacks. Someone fires a few nukes. Ultimately we get conquered. I figured I could get a call center job. So I needed to learn Chinese. Visited some 20-25 sites. Exchanged few mails with Mr. Xang, my Chinese teacher. Guy was damn boring. Maybe all Chinese are. Guess they are so much into mass production that they all sound the same. If you have similar fears about Chinese invasions, contact me. We could do some combined study.

A Bengali friend likes Tamil movies. So a three hour movie runs for six.

Hero: “Naan Unnai Kadhalikkaren” [Pause Movie]

Me: “I love you” [Resume Movie]

Heroine: “Naanum thaan” [Pause Movie]

Me: “Me too” [Resume Movie]

Bengali Friend: Hey, 10 minutes back she said she loved someone else! Your industry sucks. [Pause Movie]

Me: No, wait. Let me explain. She’s doing it to turn him into a new leaf with the ‘power of her love’ (I actually got goose bumps when I said this) [Rewind Movie]

People ask different questions. “Can you see some companies in CRP?” Some give me strange looks when I answer in the negative. “Do you still attend placement PPTs?” This next one unnerved me: “What is the system if someone gets a D in term 6?” Note the clever use of “someone” as against “you”.

Got relegated to the cc: field in e-mails.

This is a sample email I get:

From: Team Lead

To: Hardworker 1, Hardworker 2

cc: Pappu (as I am lovingly called)

Hardworker 1: Find out market share data for Firm 1

Hardworker 2: Find out strategies followed by Firm 2

Pappu: Hardworker 2 will fire the print out after completion tomorrow. Collect it from the printer (on the second floor) and submit it to the Prof.

By the way, we live on the 4th floor.

Feel jealous of people wearing suits. Guess they feel the same about me. Please explain this paradox. Be brief, please. I am a little busy these days.

Author: Praveen Prakash, BM 2005